Romney Vows to Build an America That People Can Be Leaving

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CONCORD, NH - Following a series of primary victories Tuesday, presumptive Republican presidential nominee Mitt Romney has vowed to build an America that voters from across the entire nation can truly be leaving.

Image credit: Gage Skidmore. Creative commons.

Winning a significant number of delegates in New York, Connecticut, Rhode Island, Delaware and Pennsylvania yesterday, the former Massachusetts governor insisted that he will defeat Barack Obama in November's election and implement "hugely divisive" policies that will see millions of Americans return to the lands of their forebears.

"The Mitt Romney presidency begins here," he said, prompting fears of a mass, nationwide exodus. "If anyone knows how to get this country running again, it's me. In fact, I'll have them running for the hills."

Often accused of "being out of touch with the average working family," Mr Romney insisted that every American - no matter their profession or social position - would soon witness the benefits of economic recovery and widespread job growth in places like the United Kingdom, France and Germany.

"Make no mistake about it," he continued."The policies of President Obama have let this country down. But don't worry: he ain't got nothing on me."