Obituary - David Zander's Crush on Molly Lambert

Doug Powers | Thursday, October 11, 2012 | | Best Blogger Tips

David Zander's Crush on Molly Lambert, 8, died October 9 in Zander's heart. Zander, 14, is a freshman at North Central High School. "Me and Molly [sic] have been at school together since we were in first grade," said Zander. "I remember when I saw her I thought she was so pretty. I had no idea what was even happening to me." Leafing though an old shoe box containing poems he had composed in her honor and unsent notes in which he had proclaimed his love, Zander added, "Every year she just kept getting prettier and prettier, and it just kept getting harder and harder to say anything to her." After years of pining away in vain for the object of his affections, whom he deemed unattainable, Zander noticed Tuesday that things were different. "She's still super hot," Zander said, "But my friends are right - it's time I moved on. I mean, I'm in high school now. It's stupid to keep up this childish crush when there must be a girl here I could actually be going out with, who wouldn't be so far out of my league." Reached for comment, Lambert said, "David? David Zander? What about him? Oh my god, does he want to ask me out? I've only been waiting for him to do that forever! Oh my god!" and then ran away blushing and giggling, flanked by four of her shrieking and giggling friends.


More Obituaries | Go To The Front Page

ShareThis